Advent #11

Still making my way through The Box of Delights, and I’d quite forgotten that the bishop of Tatchester, cheerful in part one, scrobbled in part four, but ultimately released and full of yuletide spirit in part six – is played by the late John Horsley who is probably best-remembered for having been Doc Morrisey in The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin.

Current image: Actor John Horsley as Doc Morrissey, holding a stethoscope to the chest of Leonard Rossiter as Reginald Perrin.

The first time I saw anything of Reggie Perrin was, ironically, the last thing they did when a five minute sketch from the Perrin team featured in The Funny Side of Christmas in 1982. Hosted by Frank Muir, it was like a selection box, an-hour-and-a-bit of specially-made Christmas sketches from a dozen or so comedies of the day.

It’s hard to imagine such a show nowadays, partly because that sense of the BBC family has gone (in the rose-tinted sense, but also in the pragmatic sense that the entire output is no longer coming out of Television Centre, Wood Lane, W12 8QT).

I was also going to say it’s hard to imagine such a show nowadays, because there aren’t any decent sitcoms anymore–

–except that’s clearly not true. But I must confess I’ve never once bothered with Count Arthur Strong, Derry Girls, Ghosts. Not even Gavin & Stacey. Somehow, the great British sitcom has become one of those things that I never bother to support but which I would be outraged about losing (like my local library or the Church of England).

So, on reflection, I suppose… I mean, really it would be no more than my civic duty to spend some time this Christmas just watching sitcoms, wouldn’t it.

Not that I want to suggest all I do is watch TV.

(I didn’t get where I am today by suggesting all I do is watch TV.)

Advent #8

At this time of year, I often find my thoughts turning towards the latest BBC Doctor Who blu-rays. (Because yes, season of goodwill notwithstanding I really am that shallow.)

The latest, released in October but promptly squirrelled away somewhere in the house to await Christmas Day, is season 13. First aired from Autumn 1975 to Spring 1976 (nicely helping to pass the time between the two long hot Summers) it’s got everything – assuming that by ‘everything’  you mean disembodied brains, killer plants and, er, some nonsense with an eyepatch in The Android Invasion. But my favourite is the opener, Terror of the Zygons, in which some whispering alien shape-changers plot to take over the world using their pet Loch Ness monster.

I was too young in 1975, so the first time I laid eyes on this beauty was in 1988 when the BBC brought it out on video – released in November but promptly squirrelled away somewhere in the house to await Christmas Day.

On the face of it there’s nothing at all Christmassy about it, other than a bit of snow on some of the location filming – but because of that first viewing all those years ago, it feels to me that it has Christmas running all the way through it. Half-drowned oil rig worker shot dead on a beach? The Doctor and Sarah Jane left to suffocate in a decompression chamber? An alien doppleganger of Harry Sullivan impaled on a pitchfork? I can practically smell the mulled wine already.

Even the Doctor puts on a special outfit for the (non-)occasion. OK, it’s not a santa suit, but it IS something special, a one-off just for this story. So special in fact that he’s sporting it on the front cover of…

Did I mention it’s out on blu-ray?

Current image: Bluray cover, featuring Tom Baker as Doctor Who wearing a Tam O'Shanter hat and a Tartan scarf.

Advent #3

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Having cynically poo-poo’d it a couple of years back I’ve given in to temptation and, almost four decades since I last saw it, am rewatching The Box of Delights.

It’s a sprawling six-part tale of time travelling and villainy (a bit like Doctor Who) and  belongs to a more innocent time – not just its period setting of England between the wars (and a rather upper-class England at that); but also in the sense that it was made in the early-eighties.

As such its special effects, though expensive for the time, are often a case of ambition outstripping technology (a bit like Doctor Who). Of course, back in the day it was accepted that you entered into the viewing contract with an agreement to suspend your disbelief where necessary. But nevertheless, I can assure you that nobody was convinced by the cartoon creatures added to the live-action footage, nor by actors got up in mouse or rat costumes. No, not even back in the naïve eighties.

But it has a superbly-haunting theme tune (a spooky rendering of The First Nowell in the opening titles, a stirring full-on orchestra version over the end credits) and a cracking first episode… Alas, the other five struggle and ultimately fail to live up to the promise of the opener. A bit like Doctor Who (The Web Planet/Underworld/Etc).

It also has a lot of snow, and a lot of warmth, and with its tale of wizards and magic, of kidnapped clerics and cathedral choirs, it’s brimful of Christmas spirit.

Not to mention the cast list. Robert Stephens as the villain. A lovely turn by James Grout as the village policeman. And as the mysterious showman Cole Hawlings… Well, I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed but he looks, well…

A bit like Doctor Who.

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Advent #22

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Although Morecambe & Wise are a Christmas institution I’m slightly too young (yes, you heard me!) to remember them at the time. No, if I associate any comedy duo with Christmas, it’s more likely to be The Two Ronnies.

Nowadays, like Eric & Ern, we tend to get ‘Best Of’ compilations of Ronnie & Ronnie, meaning we’re used to seeing great sketch after great sketch (and perhaps giving the misleading view that EVERY one was a classic).

Four Candles of course. But also the Mastermind sketch, a clever idea brilliantly exploited. Ditto the phone booth sketch, and F.U.N.E.X. Then there’s the two tramps (“I’d be richer than Rockefeller”) and my particular favourites the two guys in the… What, in the thick of it?…In the know, do you mean?… No, in the pub, the two guys in the pub.

What I love is that on the one hand Ronnie Corbett is ALWAYS Ronnie Corbett, whether he’s playing a businessman, a bus driver, or a housewife (that’s not an insult, they used to say the same thing about Humphrey Bogart (well maybe not the housewife)). Whereas Ronnie Barker is NEVER Ronnie Barker. He’s always so immersed in the part that he sounds different, he looks different, he moves in a different way…

But of course that contrast is the nature of the Two Ronnies, who weren’t really a ‘traditional’ double-act at all. Two individual comedians brought together by the BBC, brilliant together, able to go off and be brilliant on their own. Meaning they are a different kettle of fish to Morecambe & Wise, and meaning there’s plenty of space for both of them (all four of them!) at Christmas – whether they’re bringing us sunshine, or bringing us just a few late items of news!

And with that, it’s goodnight from him.

Advent #19

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Not that I want to suggest all I do is watch TV but…

Oh! BUT– actually, maybe I DON’T. Because I’ve never watched Gavin & Stacey!

I may have caught two minutes of it once (Alison Steadman discussing her breakfast I think) but that was en route to something else and I didn’t hang around. Apart from that brief encounter, it’s a show that entirely slipped under my radar. Likewise Count Arthur Strong, Ghosts, Miranda

For all that we like to bemoan the death of the sitcom, actually it still seems to be in fine form. No, not every show is a triumph – but nostalgia has made us forget that even back in the day, for every The Good Life or Yes Minister there were half a dozen Goodbye, Mr Kents or Sweet Sixteens.

Gavin & Stacey is currently making my radar ping like there’s a U Boat fleet headed straight for me, because a whole load of hype in recent weeks has made it very clear that it’s coming back for one final episode on Christmas Day. It’s the BBC’s big hope for huge festive viewing figures.

Of course, ‘huge’ is different nowadays – you can no longer ever expect to claim that almost half the population of the country has watched something, as they did back in, for example, Del & Rodney’s heyday. TV is now too fragmented, and the days where “Stupid Boy” or “Listen Very Carefully” or “Just the One, Mrs Wembley” or even “You Plonker!” would enter everyday language by cultural osmosis have gone.

But that’s not to say TV is dead (thank goodness). Less high profile, but I see there’s another one-off revival on Boxing Day, with a new episode of “Outnumbered. Now that I AM looking forward to.

Not that I want to suggest…

Advent #12

Not that I want to suggest all I do is watch TV, but…

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Still working my way through the season 25 boxset, I’ve just finished The Greatest Show in the Galaxy. Part 3 has half a claim to being a Doctor Who Christmas Special, back in 1988 when there wasn’t any such thing. Or at least, it went out inbetween Christmas and New Year, due to the ‘unexpected’ late start to the ’88 season (caused by the Olympics which, to be honest, shouldn’t really have snuck up on anyone).

Fortunately – I’m sure the Pertwee massive would like me to say ‘serendipitously’ – this particular story, with its madcap cast, its scary clowns, its circus setting and its general air of silliness is a good fit for the Christmas period; and part 3 has some great moments, from Bellboy’s ‘death by clown’ to Ace’s assessment that the Doctor is “just an aging hippy”.

Back in the day we were out when it aired so our VCR was duly programmed to record, something I found easy at 17 but would probably struggle with at 53. And because you could never quite pin down the exact start-time of anything, it was set to record with a very healthy margin of error.

Consequently, until the advent of the BluRay release this year, my copy of the story was still from that off-air VHS, meaning part 3 was preceded by a good ten minutes of Terry Wogan’s special interview with the legendary Jimmy Stewart.

All these years later, I’m afraid I no longer have my off-air tapes. And sadly neither Jimmy Stewart nor Terry Wogan is still with us. On the other hand, I can report that, at sixty-one and still fighting fit, the greatest show in the galaxy is doing just fine.

Another One Bites The Dust…

And just like that, she’s gone.

Not Liz Truss, who has discovered that although Janet Brown made it look easy during the eighties, it’s a tough job being a Thatcher impersonator. No, I’m referring to the impending (at time of writing) regeneration of yet another Doctor Who.

If I’m honest, I don’t entirely approve of this modern trend of ‘set your watch by them’ regenerations. In the old days things were much more random – a bit like schoolchildren used to memorise the wives of Henry VIII, so the departures of the old-school Doctors take some remembering (“sacked, typecasting, couldn’t get a rise, resigned, car park, Powell never replies”, something like that). Whereas nowadays there’s a definite pattern of three series, a handful of specials, and you’re out.

On the plus side, if you like that sort of thing, any six year olds getting into Doctor Who when it came back in 2005 will already have seen four regenerations, this latest being their fifth. Whereas I was not-quite three and still on Bagpuss and Bod when Jon Pertwee left, meaning I was almost in secondary school before I saw my first change (Tom Baker falling to his death saving the universe) and into puberty for my second.

Since I seem to be in a moaning mood, I don’t really approve of these new-fangled triumphant regenerations either – by which I mean they have all taken place with the Doctor actually looking pretty healthy, stood up and walking around in just the way I imagine people at death’s door don’t tend to, and with plenty of time to make long goodbye speeches (or in the case of David Tennant, what felt like a never-ending farewell tour).

For all my fifty-something grumbling however, I’m still excited, although I have to confess I’ve never yet felt the sadness that apparently a lot of people feel when a Doctor leaves – that has always been far outweighed by the excitement of a new one coming in. My main memory of the night of David Tennant’s finale, as he finally succumbed to his fate and exploded into death saving Bernard Cribbins, is not of reliving in my head the thrilling excitement of that action-packed, fan-pleasing hour-and-a-bit episode – no, it’s of logging on to the BBC website straight afterwards to watch the action-packed, fan-pleasing minute-and-a-bit trailer showing clips of incoming Matt Smith’s ‘Coming Soon’ debut season.

“The old man must die” says a character in Jon Pertwee’s final adventure (in an accent and in make-up which we’d nowadays call questionable, but let’s leave that for now) – “and the new man will discover to his inexpressible joy that he has never existed.” That’s probably why Doctor Who is still around all these years later – not just because of the brilliant idea of being able to ‘in story’ replace and refresh the lead, but because it’s always moving forward. That’s certainly why I maintain that new Doctor Who is always more exciting than old, because every time you sit down to a new episode there’s the possibility it will be the best one they’ve ever done.

So although I’ll no doubt be complaining if a perfectly healthy Jodie fireworks away on Sunday night after giving us her equivalent of an Oscar acceptance speech, I’ll still be watching. Excited for the regeneration and excited to see what’s next.

It’s quite a thing to think that, give or take a day or six, this latest regeneration is going out exactly fifty-six years after the very first one. All these years later it’s hard to imagine what it must have been like to watch that at the time – but the impossible effect of turning the face of William Hartnell into that of Patrick Troughton remains one of the most convincing and jaw-dropping sequences the show has ever done. An eerily darkened TARDIS, the sound of the time machine’s engines, a blazing light engulfing the Doctor’s face…

And just like that, he’s gone.

Signing Off

Controversial perhaps, but I’m really going to miss him.

Oh I know he’ll be with us until the Autumn, but that’ll soon come round… and then, no more ‘Steve Wright in the Afternoon’ on Radio 2. I know!! If there’s been a more surprising news story in the past week, I’ve yet to hear it.

Radio’s an odd thing. Certainly I know I take it for granted. It’s never ‘appointment listening’, I never make a point of putting it on and giving it my full attention – it’s just there, a convenient soundtrack when I need it. In the car is the obvious example, or in the background at work, or (in the very specific case of Paul Gambaccini’s Pick of the Pops) when I’m mopping the kitchen floor.

But on the other hand, despite my cavalier approach to it, and my treating it as unimportant and disposable; at the same time I definitely do expect it to be there, fixed and unchanging. In every other medium – in film, on TV, books even – we’re always after the next big thing, something new. With radio I think we want, we like, it to stay the same.

Hence why it seems entirely natural that Steve Wright has been doing the same show since before the millennium (and Ken Bruce seems to have been doing likewise since God was a boy). Even relative newcomer Jeremy Vine has been in his lunchtime slot for 19 years – and there’s maybe no better indicator of the seemingly-fixed and unchanging, monumental nature of radio than to point out that, name aside, what Mr Vine is actually presenting is ‘The Jimmy Young show’.

The voice of Jimmy Young, always sounding ever so slightly as if he had a boiled sweet in the corner of his mouth, instantly makes me think of Summer holidays – perhaps wistfully and probably inaccurately, nevertheless I associate his voice with sitting in the back seat hearing him during long car journeys. Just as Terry Wogan was the voice that heralded each school day, during his first stint on the breakfast show when he made Dallas a household name and when he insisted (which is why I still sing it of course) that the opening line to ABBA’s Super Trouper refers to calling “from Tesco.”

And Steve Wright is the voice of teenage days, more specifically the thrilling relief of the bus ride home from college. That was on Radio 1 of course, and yet it seemed entirely right that, years later, when I came back to radio, he had graduated to doing pretty much the same show on Radio 2.

That’s not a complaint or a criticism, and although it’s not actually the same show there’s enough comfortable familiarity to give the sense that he’s been a fixture for even longer than the twenty-three years he’s been there. So the largely-nameless posse of Radio 1 is now Tim Smith, Bobbie Pryor, and Janey Lee Grace (with the sexiest laugh in radio). The Friday Montage is not that distant a relative of the 3 o’clock Non-Stop Oldies. And there’s a very clear line from the ‘Factoids’ of today to the ‘Another True Story’ of yesteryear.

He’s not everybody’s cup of tea, I’ll admit. My colleague at work (who’s a bit younger and a lot less nostalgic) isn’t as keen, but even he has come to accept that Steve Wright on Radio 2 is infinitely preferable to being bombarded by Johnny Vaughan on Radio X. His main bugbear is Friday’s final feature, 45 minutes of “Serious Jockin’” which is basically dance with a heavy beat. I don’t mind the music so much, but the pedant in me struggles with Steve’s claim that taking the ‘g’ off the end of the word is a pun. It’s not clever or witty wordplay, not in my book anyway; on the contrary (and as the apparently never-ending stream of ‘no-g’ messages makes clear) any idiot can do it.

Be all that as it may, I will still very much miss Steve Wright (in the afternoon) when the time comes. Still, I suppose we have to accept that nobody can go on forever.

Not even Prime Ministers…

Advent #8

For several years through the 1990s, One Foot in the Grave fielded a Christmas special. Often, but not always, on Christmas Day, not even always about Christmas, but still in a quiet sort of way it was an annual fixture just as much as the far more feted Only Fools.

My memory, which granted may be at fault, seems to think that often, but not always, they flirted with the idea, or at least teased it enough in the hype beforehand, that the latest special might be the last ever episode, that they might even kill Victor off. They never did of course – not at Christmas anyway.

Ironically perhaps, given that its leads are two… older characters, both Richard Wilson and Annette Crosbie are still with us (whereas it’s with real sadness that I look at the regular cast of The Vicar of Dibley and see that only three of them are left now) so in theory at least they could come back and do some more…

…If it weren’t for the fact that, again ironically (I’m beginning to think that if Alanis Morisette had just held on a few more years, she could have got a fifth verse out of this) they DID, ultimately, though not at Christmas, kill Victor off.

There’s a case to be made that One Foot was/is the last great BBC sitcom, and in a way that I can’t quite explain (unless “it’s because you’re getting old, Curnow” is any sort of explanation) it really takes me aback to realise it started over 30 years ago, and ended over 20. I… Well…

I don’t believe it.

Life on Mars

I’m not mad, I’ve gone back in time.

I’ve wanted to rewatch Life on Mars for ages, and thanks to iPlayer I’ve finally managed it. Unbelievably, it’s already twelve years since the last episode aired, and I’m pleased to report that I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it (again).

It’s still as intriguing and compelling a show as it was in 2006/07 – although its celebrated opening monologue (“Am I mad, in a coma, or back in time?”) is, with hindsight, a bit of an oddity. Frankly, by the time I’d moved on to rewatching season two I’d taken to heckling the TV every time the titles ran, because it’s made so abundantly clear that it’s (b) in a coma, I’m surprised it was ever up for debate.

To be fair, halfway through the final episode the show tries to convince us that it is in fact (a) he’s mad, that Sam is actually from 1973 but suffering from amnesia, and that his 2006 is just a product of his imagination; but sadly the bluff doesn’t last more than about ten minutes and I can’t help but wonder if it might have been a more effective plot twist if it had featured in the penultimate episode, giving us a whole week to ponder if everything we thought we knew was wrong.

In some ways it feels like no time has passed since the series originally aired… and yet, on the other hand I find it very hard to imagine it even getting made today.

Gene Hunt was possibly controversial even in 2006, but despite his deliberately offensive old-fashioned attitudes towards sex and race and the occasional bit of gratuitous violence in the pursuit of his enquiries… Despite all that, the show always lands him on the side of the angels (albeit sometimes only just). Several times he styles Manchester as ‘his city’ and casts himself in the role of its sheriff, doing the dirty work so that ordinary people can sleep safely in their beds.

I don’t think today we (although by ‘we’ I mean the militantly offended (often on Twitter)) would be so accepting of the ambiguity, the grey morality of such a character. And although Sam Tyler is clearly the hero of the piece, likely he would come in for criticism too. Not because of his own attitudes, but because of the many occasions when he lets Hunt ‘get away with it’. Sam never treats Annie as anything but an equal, but he rarely if ever calls Gene out on his far more sexist and dismissive behaviour towards her. That sort of ‘tacit acceptance’ would definitely not sit well with the Twitterati.

Then there’s the final episode which ends (spoiler warning) with Sam killing himself. The production ascribes a nobility and a triumph to the act, beguiling us into all-but cheering him on – but in strictly ‘factual’ terms this is an ending where a man, clearly suffering from far more trauma than the medical experts assigned to him have identified, takes his own life, in the deluded belief it will return him to a better place where he can be with the (entirely fictional) woman he (believes he) loves.

It also, in one sense, vindicates Gene Hunt. Sam rejects modern policing (represented in a colourless scene of dull people in suits discussing suspects’ rights) in favour of a time where he can gun down a criminal during an unauthorised undercover operation, without fear of disciplinary action of any sort.

Maybe it’s trying to claim the world of imagination is as important as the daily reality? Or is it the opposite, a cautionary tale warning us against the more alluring, more seductive, more dangerous inner world?

It’s very hard to be sure, and actually whether it was deliberate or not, the ambiguity, the grey and murky morality, really appealed to me, in a way that I don’t recall being aware of first time around. It’s been a very enjoyable rewatch, and (unless you’re likely to be offended and take to Twitter) I’d definitely recommend firing up the iPlayer. Just be prepared for what you might see, that’s all.

Take a look at the lawman beating up the wrong guy…